عايشه منيرة

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Rawang, Malaysia
A living flesh with a soul made of glass.

Sunday, May 24, 2015

Chin up and keep walking.

It was a hot sunny, afternoon. The sun being the ultimate king, glistening and looking radiant as per usual. A tear of sweat rolls down her forehead, signifying that the heat is taking over the atmosphere. As she wiped it away, her hijab moved out of place, loosening out her fine hairs. Using her delicate fingers, she tucked her fine hairs back in and secured the hijab in place. There, a fine and decent girl you are, she claimed. It was a part of her, of what she was and her identity. She had to make sure of that.

Her last class of the day finally wraps up, and feeling relieved, she heads towards the faculty's main entrance. Today was very tiresome, her spirit was slowly setting down just as the sun was. Not bothering on taking the campus bus, she decides to take a stroll around the lake. She figured that she is in dire need of  therapy from the greenery, from the nature. From an entity that no human can offer and being in a different surrounding is all the heart needs, for now. Tranquility and inner peace, away from the distress and negativity. For the past few months, those things had been drilling virtually into her head and she had no 'exit' door to escape. She wished she had a 'reset' button embedded into her brain. But there were no options, she had to take it all in. Her soul was contaminated and stained. She felt troubled and extremely tired. Her mind was mentally damaged and she was screaming painly in silence. Of course, not a soul minded.

As she paced towards the path beside the lake, the sun was already acting out, beautifully. Trees and wind accompanied her while she was lost in thoughts, and now the sun was even more dazzling. How does one not see and appreciate this kind of alluring beauty? They ask for miracles from God, without knowing that miracles happen only if we just look what's in front of us and ponder. It was her way of finding solace, besides reconnecting with God. That is to develop a mutual feeling with the nature. Its something not all can experience and that one to one connection is somehow priceless.

She sees the birds, soaring freely above the clouds. How carefree life could be if struggling to fly high and foraging for food was the only thing that mattered. God has purposely created them like this. She sees the puffy white clouds, stood high above our heads, all looking like a cotton candy. Not only it showers the warm earth with rain, it keeps us shaded from the scorching sun. And for a second she thought, all these elements of earth inspire her in a way to become a much more positive person. A person she used to be. Why? Because these elements are not like us. They don't have feelings or emotions. They have no intelligence. But their devotion to earth, to us and to God is just indescribable. It made her realized that she missed her old self, a lot. She used to be poised and ecstatic. She walked the earth with grace. She faced all the hurdles, not knowing of the implications, but she did it anyways. Her heart was brave and she got out of comfort zone. She said what she needed to say, listened to what she needed to hear. She paid no attention to those small voices of despair. Demanding her to give up on life. Because hope and faith, is what she was made of. Both elements are not easily detached, and she made sure of that. Life was much more easier than before.
She let out a huge sigh.

As the sun was no more visible, she knew it was time to leave. She knew, that short period of reflection was not for a naught. She knew, in life trials and hardships are just the true essence to it. Without it, she'll never know her capabilities. Yes, it can be rough. It's not always smooth sailing. It's not always a bed of roses nor sunshine all day. It's that gist of life that makes her feel appreciated by God. For the soulful journey. For the never ending blessings in disguise.

And she knew, to always chin up and keep walking.

Bukit Nanas Forest Reserve, KL.

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