عايشه منيرة

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Rawang, Malaysia
A living flesh with a soul made of glass.

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Balik Kampung Cheetham: Part 2



After a good night rest, packed everything, ate breakfast and checked out for our early shopping trip. Firstly we went to Asda. Its basically the 'Aeon' for us back then. Everything was darn cheap, from the clothing to the food. It feels weird buying things and then multiplying it by 6, just to compare the Malaysian value haha.








Back then, we hated going to this place. This is my parents playground..lol



So at Boundary Mills, I looked for a jacket because the weather didn't feel like summer, as stated on the weather forecast. Not when its 11 or 13 degrees outside. Umi, my sister and I managed to score some really cool ones with a fairly good price. I decided not to spend so much before coming here because I know its much cheaper and more choice to choose from.
And then it's time to say goodbye to Burnley, we're off to Kampung Cheetham :)



Coming back here, memories started to flood my mind. Cheetham Hill is not that big, but not that small either. Its basically the Asian hub of Manchester. Easy to find halal food. So buying groceries wasn't that hard. I remember having Malaysia lauk everyday cooked by my mum because the ingredients are more or less the same like Pakistani or Indian's food. 

So the first place that we decided to visit was our house, 48 Faraday Avenue and 4 Holst Avenue. These houses holds the most memories of me growing up here as a child. Those times when I played outside when it's summer, those times when it snowed (picture below), those times when we had to walk to school and Aisyah Haziqah came and knocking on our door. Bittersweet..and yes I enjoyed every bit of em and never have I felt a sense of regret. I never complained because obviously I wouldn't get to re-live anywhere else.


Me and my sister, 2007



Us, now 2017 at 48 Faraday Avenue

As you can see, our house was very small and compact. Door open, take 2-3 steps and then it's the road already. But then again, we never complained about our house either. At that stage of life, it was comfortable enough to fit the 5 of us. All the basic needs of a decent house was there. We even had a room to ourselves. Small kitchen but my mum spent most of her time cooking and feeding us in the morning (and packing the best lunch ever) after we got back from school hungrily. The living room and dining room was also adequate for the 5 us, we could fit a TV. My little sister could play all her toys and we had guests coming over. It was enough for everything.







4 Holst Avenue.

So this is the house that we stayed before coming back to Malaysia in 2005. Dec 2003 until some time in 2005. I was around 10-11 years, puberty didn't hit me just yet haha. But still, a lot of memories here too. I spent the summer playing outside a lot. We had bikes, scooters and rollers blades that were bought cheap from car boot sales. Became good friends with the neighbour next door too. Both Pakistanis :)


Just a few hours after we arrived in the UK :)


Before heading to school.

Just a few pictures of us back then, before and after. Well physically it's quite obvious right? haha
And then we just strolled around the neighbourhood. Nothing much has changed to be honest.





This was the kedai runcit for us. Cash and carry. Lol. The uncle is still working there but the butcher was no where to found. Dulu my sisters would always tease me with the butcher guy because he likes to mimic to what I say and I find him very annoying lol



1.99 pound milk. 


Time for lunch! Donner kebab is our main target. Tak ada donner kebab I am just gonna cry in the corner haha. The shop that we used to buy either for delivery or takeaway does not have a place to eat, so we had to eat at this takeaway called Faisal's. It was okay for me, still tasted the same as well. Donner kebab means achievement unlocked!




I'm drooling now mashaAllah.....

And then we hit the road back again. Next destination: Marlborough Primary School and North Manchester General Hospital, where Saufi was born :)



The red building behind, is the school's main building. Opposite of the building on the left side is our playground for play time. We had a chat with one of the staff and surprisingly the uniform is still the same as well!


My mum used to pick us up but not from the main entrance as shown above. Somewhere around the back entrance where she had to fetch Nurul first from Nursery. And yes, nothing much has changed here, even after 10 years! We were tempted to go inside the building but it didn't feel nice just to storm in the school even though we were alumnus lol

Then...


with Devon


That blue tudung ruled me those days. I would go on for days because I was really obsessed with the color haha



Saufi's birthplace. Umi started recalling her fond memories of delivering my not so little brother. The treatments, medical care and midwife was amazing and satisfactory. Midwives even came to check on Saufi when he was around 2-3 weeks old. I must say their healthcare is top notch too.



Poor Saufi, he didn't remember much of those days. Well duh, he was just a baby back then. He was born on the 15th February 2005, and it was snowing heavily that time. We called him the snow baby :P


Me being the kak long, of course la dapat pegang my newborn baby brother kan hehe


There's more for the next destination. But I will hold this recent trip closely dear to my heart. Coming back here, it was a therapy actually. A reminder, I used have the blissful life that I didn't pray for but Allah decided to choose all of us to be here. I was happy growing up and negativity didn't take me in that much. Islamophobia? None. Nada. Zero. Everyone was pretty much tolerating with the differences we all had, and we respected those differences. Obviously the way to distinguish our differences was based on what we wear, our language or what we eat, things that are tied to the culture. But still, no hate. That's why coming back here, I had that 1% of feeling slightly nervous about my presence there. Being a muslim in this era puts all of us at stake. Everywhere we go, whatever we decided to I always had this precaution to be mindful and this isn't my country and I shouldn't just do or say whatever I like. Back then, the most threatening question that I used to get was,

"What's that on your head?"
And I answered them thoroughly. All the bits that they need to know about my religion and why I had to do it. I even asked my dad if I were to be asked about my head scarf, what are things that I should say. Sometimes people are just curious, and it's not wrong for them to ask, to be educated. Even though the buildings, the landmarks and the roads seemed to look the same, the mentality and how people perceive definitely has changed. 10 years was probably enough to change the public's mindset on the differences that we all had, and we all know it's the media that does all the hard work right?

Anyways this is one long post. An emotional one, allow me to indulge in this moment please? lol...haha. So I'll continue more on the next destination as it's getting quite late. InshaAllah.





Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Balik kampung Cheetham Part 1




So remember when I said about having our Eid slightly different this year? Its because we get to go back to our kampung from 2002-2007! Well its Saufi's kampung to be honest since he was born there, but this trip was a good 'walk' down the memory lane.

We had planned this since last year, knowing that Eid holidays will be longer for everyone and for the bonus I'm currently having my school holiday break for one month. So there isnt a need to apply for leave. Just on the 1st of Syawal itself, we packed everything ready since the day before and our flight was past midnight on the 26th June, 2:55 am. Baba couldn't pick a better time for all of us right -_-. Alhamdulillah the 14 hour journey was smooth, leaving us knackered as we arrive London Heathrow Airport, around noon. We rented an MPV for 4 days, and our destination is of course to Manchester!

On the way to Manchester, everyone was hungry and cranky. So we stopped at Beaconsfield Services to have our lunch. When we saw 'Greggs' signage, everyone started to squeal! (by everyone means me and my sister lol). After 10 years, we only get to eat Greggs 'Cheese and Onion' and it tasted absolutely the sameeee!





(proof that I'm jakun)



After that, we're headed to Holiday Inn, Burnley. The reason why Baba booked the hotel there is because it's near to Boundary Mills. Yes..the first thing to do upon arrival in the UK is none other than shopping *inserts rolling eyes emoji* but the rooms were amazing. I stayed with my two younger brothers and we had a good sleep after that. After checking in, again we were hungry (not surprsing) and googled for the nearest halal food takeaway. Thank God in the small corner of Burnley there is this Bangladeshi takeaway, the ONLY asian takeaway store that you can find there and their food was seriously top notch. I was not in the mood for rice like others (they ordered lamb biryani) but definitely yes for kebab. The kebab was really nice, the naan was so gebu and the meat was really tangy in my mouth. So now you'd know why I had a good sleep after that haha.


When I see these small and quaint houses, was even more excited to see my old house back in Cheetham Hill :)



Recommended to stay. Free wifi and breakfast was a good one.



InshaAllah will continue for Day 2 tomorrow. Bye!


Sunday, July 09, 2017

Syawal



Salam guys. It's Syawal, alhamdulillah. Celebrated mine the same ol' way, that is at home safe and sound. Although this year's Eid is slightly different from the previous years...will blurt everything out soon!

In the meantime, Taqabballahu minna wa minkum! May Allah accept from you and us :)



from us, the Cools :)

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Fast forward


Hello guys. I am back, finally after 3 months of being hiatus. Its so hard to just sit for an hour to do some blogging. Instead its hours of composing emails to school, parents, updating this and that and constantly going online on Telegram, just to keep updated for work. Life is currently demanding, overwhelming and moving very fast. Approaching May soon, the most busiest month for school. Back to back events on weekends, and only God knows how I will turn out by the end of May. You'd probably see me as a carcass beside the road because I'd be dead by then hahahaha okay that's so exaggerating. Currently its the 29th April, and on Monday it will be a public holiday. So it will be a very long weekend for everyone. Sadly didn't get to make any plans because it was told last minute and its very hard to make early arrangements without knowing the confirmation of our holidays. You see, we have this love and hate relationship with public holidays..but I'd rather keep it shut for now haha so lets not dwell into that.

So many things have been happening.Ups and downs, beating around the normality. Getting up everyday in the morning to face the never ending responsibilities. Its all very demanding and tiring. Physically, and mentally. Lets not forget the personal side of life too. MashaAllah..how do I put it into words. I don't think I can. I think I won't speak about it. Let's keep it that way for now, inshaAllah.

All I know is, I'm going through a bad phase of self development. I mean, its really ironic that I am the person who is accountable for every child's character development in school, but looking at my current state right now, I am far fetched to even become a role model for them. Imagine living in that irony everyday and making up to the loopholes that I've created. Its a struggle that I have to deal everyday, thinking ya Allah there is a reason why I was sent here. But the amazing thing is that, I get endless opportunities to make things right. I am surrounded why souls who constantly remind me of God. To be God conscious always. The feeling, subhanallah is just amazing. Its amazing to feel connected back to Allah, once you have been strayed so far. There comes a time where I look forward to feel Allah's mercy and love, because I know it goes beyond everything. No other creation can surpass His love and mercy. Alhamdulillah, I am forever grateful to know that He wont let me go far because in the end I would come back looking for Him.

Sometimes I forget that all the worries and grief are only temporary.
Sometimes I forget that whatever happens, be it a calamity or not, He has decreed upon it.

Few weeks ago, I attended a gathering by Sister Ayesha Syahira and quoting to what she said, when something bad happens to you, do know that Allah has arranged it. He knows that it is the best for us. And Yasmin Mogahed said the same thing. For every situation that we have dealt with, good or bad, it all depends on how you see the aftermath. 'Bad things does not happen to good people'. And mashaAllah it definitely changed my views on all the miseries in life that I have encountered. What have I gain from it? Did it elevate me to become stronger? For every situation that Allah has put you through, you are supposed to gain something from it. And inshaAllah its never for a nought. Never.

I pray to Allah that He eases everything..everything that is chasing after me, and all the things that I am unsure of. If its for the best, please make me content ya Allah. If its not good for me or them, please remove myself so that they can get the life that they deserve. If this is test for us to bear, to see if we depend on your existence, then make us strong willed ya Allah.

Say ameen guys.




Sunday, January 01, 2017

Comeback




It's almost midnight, just less an hour we bid farewell to 2016. Its been months since this personal space of mine was updated. I am far behind, I guess.

Few years back, around this time I would be locked up in room digesting the never ending slides/lecture notes. Studying for the upcoming exam papers. New year is just like, meh. Nothing special or new. Even if its a public holiday, the guilt of not trying hard enough to finish all the chapters for each subject kills you until you are finally done. This flashback makes me miss the student life back then. Its just so different now. I didn't expect the post-undergraduate life would be this difficult. For every decision you make, becomes a chain reaction of what's gonna happen next. It affects other people too, with or without their acknowledgement.

It needs a lot of hard work, a lot of trying. That's how I dealt the situation. I can't give up. Recalling back those hard times, it hit me rock bottom but I didn't just stop there. I kept on going. This time, it shouldn't be any different. I'm miles away from reaching my dream, but somehow Allah is telling me that I should be at the spot where I am now. Its never for a naught. If this is the time where I can invest a lot for my akhirah, inshaAllah I am up for the challenge. Allah is making me stronger, day by day. I'm quite amazed at myself for sticking through those crappy times. It affected me so bad, that people would come up to me and expressed their concerns on my physical appearance and how my face doesn't even look like a face. I personally think that it deserves to be punched. Sigh

Despite having all of this never ending doubts running in my head, I have to look what's around me. I have to be thankful that I am employed. I have to be grateful that my colleagues trust my abilities to do this and that. Even if its far fetched from what I've been studying for degree, I believe that someday the skills I obtained will be useful and applicable. Allah is providing me the channel to do good, to contribute for the ummah and He granted my du'a/wish to work with these people. My passion for biological science will never fade and I will still pursue my dreams, even if it comes a long way.

So 2016 is an interesting year for me.
I get to do some travelling, went to interviews, submitted resumes and faced multiple rejections, met new people and bonded with those whom I can call sisters, met my ex-HOD who had taught me a lot on the useful life skills and still remaining in touch with her, had my UM convocation and my dear parents was there to witness it, moved on from someone who never had the slightest idea that I existed in his life.

I came across a quote that sounded something like this, 

'When Allah takes someone that you love away from you, He will replace it with someone even better that you yourself cant even imagine'

I guess this is happening to me right now. And I am ever so thankful to Allah :)





Nothing much I could ask or hope for, but for all the good things to happen. Never stop praying to the One that will grant it. May Allah guide me always.

Lillahi ta'ala :)


اِنَّ صَلاَتِي وَنُسُكِي وَمَحْيَايَ وَمَمَاتِي ِﷲِ رَبِّ الْعَالَمِينَ
Indeed my prayer, my sacrifice, my life and my death are for Allaah, Lord of the worlds.