عايشه منيرة

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Rawang, Malaysia
Naive, very. Adore the blue sky infinitely.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Exit the Adversity



"Keep ambitions high, in front of God and people, Your credibility will be in proportion to your ambitions"

— Couplet, by Mawlana Faizani


Right now, I should be thinking about what I should be in the future, an ambition that is to be specific. The phase one of UPU has just opened for application, and I still need to buy the ID. I should go through all the courses available, along with my qualification for sem 1 and MUET. Speaking of MUET, congrats to those who got distinctions, whatever 'band' it is. Anyways, Im making a short observation on some people that I encountered lately. It can be anyone that I know. For sure, these people have inspired me a lot, especially in terms of their profession or ambition. Is it not the same thing? It is right. To achieve this equilibrium of life, of course, education is definitely important.

It all started with a simple learning. Knowledge is vital for every one of us to hold, its something what the society would look out in ourselves. We all know how important education is. We all know how learning ABC is the basic process of learning. Sometimes, knowledge isn't always attainable from books, but from life experiences, observation and moral values. We all know that a normal human would spend almost a decade in going through their stages of education, for instance in Malaysia, after their primary school exam aka UPSR, they will spend another 3 years for PMR, which in this phase qualifies the student to be either in arts stream or pure-science stream. Last but not least, SPM. This is probably the exam of life. The exam that torture most of the students, where we were pressurized by teachers and parents, prob by the minister of education too. We became their hopes, in creating a new generation for the future. We are the ones that should continue our leader's legacy. Anyways, Being in a boarding school, honestly we have to think about 3 things : parents, teachers, SCHOOL. We must at least compete among other residential schools and this is the part where we are bound to feel tensed. It was all based on my personal experience so our perspectives would differ. Anyways, SPM really determines
the path of life. Pass with distinctions, get qualified for a scholarship and study for the right field for years, graduate and find a job. There, future secured!

Since these things start with education, personally, I think learning process is never easy. I faced many ordeals throughout my studying years. I don't simply understand on the spot when teacher is deriving a formula, and not really helpful when our lecturers teach us like the speed of light, which will lead to sleepiness, going on Twitter or Facebook (lol). Why? Because I was not born to be genius like Nur Amalina or Sufiah (who both have shocked the nation with their own issues). I was born to strive, achieve for the best. Even if its not the best, malays would say 'cukup-cukup makan'. And that is why, we muslims are obligated to seek knowledge, apply for what we have yet to learn and what outcomes can we achieve from the knowledge. And intention or 'niat' is so so important. Sincerity, whether it is potrayed or not, somehow we have to achieve it. I would ask myself, what is my intention in studying, over and over again. Until I decided to write it on the post-it-notes and stick it on my wall, so that everyday I am reminded. The only thing that pops in my mind about intention is Allah, parents and Islam. InsyaAllah, God will ease your journey. The reason to have the right 'niat' is simply because we would want a blessing from Allah, in everything that we do. Doing something for the sake of Allah and it brings contentment in you. The feeling is just beautiful right?

This however is a personal observation, as I have developed to become such an observant person these years -_-, somehow it relates to a person who does not perform his/her role as a muslim, or in other words part-time muslim. Of course, who am I to judge or label the person like that. But, I just feel that sometimes its unfair for those who tried hard in becoming a good muslim despite being a student in a very challenging environment, seeing those who are 'part time' muslims and still, able to pursue their dreams, make their parents proud and they were happy. Even small little things I would measure from these type of people, and they seem not to be aware of it, or just didnt know. But then again, events in life do happen for a solid reason. Allah knows what His servants needs, even if it seemed different or wrong from our perspective, yet we, you and I shouldn't question the fate. He plans everything in a flow, even if we have to strive, pray and tawakal, still He has laid out the path that we should walk, appreciating the essence of patience, and waiting for the right time to arrive.

I am always optimistic, but sometimes when failures in any form fall to your hands like a raindrop from the sky, it is really bitter and painful. Sometimes I would always think I was born to become a failure. I have to fail first, then I would succeed ,its like a sequence. Why can't I just be like those people who rarely fails in everything that they do, smoothly as it is, everything meets its expectation, or when they didn't put so much effort but in the end, the outcome is just pretty much better than those who put on a lot of hard work.


These occurences, really made me think deep, as I can go. And sometimes, it failed me to create an imaginary future, to predict without having uncertainties. Yes, I love imagining, people. Its a normal hobby for an eighteen year old..I think.

What I Iearnt so far is,
You fail, you succeed.
You fall, you get back up.

In conclusion, its like a repercussion, a reaction, plus comm
on sense. Just patience that matters the most. Rightio?

" O you who believed, seek help with patience, perseverance and prayer. For Allah is with those who patiently persevere" - Al-Baqarah ( 2 : 153 )

" No one will be granted with such goodness except those who excercise with patience and self-restraint, none but the persons of the greatest good fortune" Al - Fussilat (41: 35)


Lets not make the world our biggest concern shall we?




Sunday, January 08, 2012

Oh~


Bonjour mes amis~

A lovely morning.
Got up at ****, Allah gave me an MC for a few days, so I have a reason to wake up slightly a little bit later than the usuals :p and not a morning person too heehee.
Got myself cleaned, washed and dressed. Its Sunday, so time to do all the chores left undone, though I already washed my clothes via washing machine yesterday. So today is only 'lipat kain' and spring-cleaned the room which is full of dusts everywhere.
And AlMathurat to ease this troubled mind of mine, lately.

I felt the cold morning breeze twirling in my face. Its a sign, that
somehow this day, I'll be good friends with the nature. Because the nature itself have no feelings, live by their functions and obeys their Creator, mostly.

One thing Im very certain for now is, I have thrown away the key to the door, miles and miles away. So that no one can find it, even myself. Sick and tired definitely, and I dont think Im up for it anymore. I dont want my focus to be distorted and didnt see it coming. So now its locked, will remain locked until I decided to find the key back.



Nestum and Oats flapjack, a simple breakfast.

Good Day ;)

Friday, January 06, 2012

First and foremost, 2012


Salam and evening.

Currently, having a bad fever. Night time is the most critical period where I sneeze non-stop and looking like a person who just cried for a year. Lol.
Well, just a small fever and haven't had it for a few months, I should be thankful right..heehee.
Anyways, its the new year of the 21st century, I guess its not too late for me to wish right?
So Happy New Year! :) New year, new blessings, let the past leave us in small trails of memories and hoping for the best of tomorrow!

I just realised that Melancholy Seed is now 6 years old o.O

Just want to share or highlight a few things or events that somehow made 2011 a quite meaningful year.

- A school leaver, official yeh yeh


Brassidium 2 09/10

- Alhamdulillah, the most precious gift given by Allah for now, SPM



- P-license holder ( trying not to even THINK of those crappy times where I failed the test)

mr google bagi hikhik

- A kindergarten teacher! This part, I very like. It is because I gained experience in teaching UpinIpin'ers, developing a loving and caring plus sensible attitude around them..eh sorry terperasan kejap. Wakaka


- First timer on formal interviews eg. scholarship.

(this picture doesn't exist)


- A university student - exposure of more hectic life eg. assignments, lab reports, tutorials, term paper and so on. Time management, social skills, discipline, consistency of academic performance and punctuality, all are very important. Lack one of these, I think I'll end up myself in big big trouble. True story lol



- Umi and Baba did their hajj, syukur syukur, separating from parents for 1 month and 2 weeks is really scary T_T


- Terengganu with dear dormmates, it was a memorable trip with them definitely :)

Taman Tamadun Islam

- My 18th birthday. Dunno why o.O

My very own 18th birthday cheesecake, made by Umi. The bestest in the world.

- Lastly, Friends. I made new friends through Facebook, Blogger, interviews, MDS, Kindergarten, UiTM Puncak Alam..and thats about it I think. Allow me to stress on this part. I think I met so many new people last year, that I somehow got a little bit carried away. By this, its trust. I was naive in meeting new people especially via the virtual world, didn't set barriers and I trust them easily, like they were the best people I met, YET. It didn't occur to me that I actually got into a mess of some unwanted or unknown businesses, which of course affected me slightly. I was thankful that finally I was out of the muddled-up situation and for that, I was more careful in believing words or actions. Because that particular moment can turn up anytime, and probably wasting my time worrying about whats my next step, what I should respond and bla bla. So, no more of that I hope please. I have no time in wasting your time dispersing out things I do not want to hear especially if it has nothing to do with me. Comprehende? But then again looking on the bright side, not all humans are like that. I am thankful once again that I met a few people who actually changed the way I think about life and its branches, the purpose of this and that, and most importantly, the people who brought me closer to Allah of course. A million thanks to them, although hidayah is owned by Allah, but it is given to us as a guidance, something we should hold onto for the rest of our lives. My apologies if I had hurt anyone's feelings instantaneously when reading this.

So I think thats about it.

Events coming up after this, Test 1; Asasi Night;Penang Excursion; Test 2 ; Study week ; finals. bestnya heehee.
Define time? Above here is what 'time' means. Fast and escapes without a trace :)


Thank you UmiBaba&sibling, friends, teachers, relatives, muslims from all over the globe for making 2011 a meaningful year for me. May Allah bless and place us all together in Jannah, ameen.



I am a traveler seeking the truth, a human searching for the meaning of humanity and a citizen seeking dignity, freedom, stability and welfare under the shade of Islam. I am a free man who is aware of the purpose of his existence and who proclaims: “Truly, my prayer and my sacrifice, my living and my dying are all for Allah, the Lord of the worlds; no partner has He. This, am I commanded and I am of those who submit to His Will.” This is who I am. Who are you?
- Imam Shaheed Hassan Al Banna

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Fly like the wind


Tok Guru's house at Pulau Melaka, very green









Good Day :)

*back to Rawang tomorrow.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Aku cantik


Aku ingin jadi cantik.

Aku ingin jadi seorang perempuan yang cantik.

Aku ingin cantikkan akalku dengan ilmu yang bermanfaat.

Aku ingin cantikkan hatiku dengan iman dan takwa kepada Allah semata-mata.

Aku ingin cantikkan hatiku dengan rasa cinta yg utama pada Allah dan mencintai kerana Allah.

Aku ingin cantikkan tubuh badanku dengan tutupan kain yang longgar dan tebal.

Aku ingin cantikkan mataku dengan menundukkan pandangan.

Aku ingin cantikkan bibirku dengan tutur kata yang sopan dan banyakkan zikrullah.

Aku ingin cantikkan wajahku dengan perasaan malu dan senyuman.

Aku ingin cantikkan langkah kakiku dengan mengunjungi tempat ibadah dan majlis-majlis ilmu.

Aku ingin cantikkan kulitku dengan mandi wajib dan wudhu' yang sempurna.

Aku ingin cantikkan rambutku dengan litupan kain tudung yang labuh.

Aku ingin cantikkan jari jemariku dengan menghulurkan sedekah jariah.

Aku ingin cantikkan telingaku dengan mendengar alunan ayat-ayat suci Allah.

Aku ingin cantikkan tangan dan kakiku dengan taat dan bekerja kerana Allah.

Aku ingin cantikkan perutku dengan puasa dan memakan makanan yang halal dan berkhasiat.

Aku ingin cantikkan akhlakku dengan mencontohi akhlak Rasulullah SAW.

Aku ingin cantikkan sentuhanku dengan menyentuh hanya yang halal.

Aku ingin cantikkan suaraku dengan tidak mendayu-dayukan ia di hadapan lelaki bukan muhrim.

Aku ingin cantikkan pandanganku dengan mengambil iktibar atas setiap pandangan.

Aku ingin cantikkan amarahku dengan niat kerana Allah.

Aku ingin cantikkan ketegasanku dengan kelembutan.

Aku ingin cantikkan kepimpinanku dengan kejujuran.

Aku ingin cantikkan persaudaraanku dengan keikhlasan.

Aku ingin cantikkan rinduku dengan titipan doa yang tulus ikhlas.

Aku ingin jadi seorang perempuan yang cantik.

Semoga Allah mengizinkan, ameen.


courtesy of Sis Sakinah Aziz's blog.

Friday, December 09, 2011

Recalling moments called Memories

Memories.

Something we possess, for the time being, from the past and sooner, the future. For every stage in life that we fly through, it is a memory that one should treasure and remember. Why am I actually pertaining memories as the subject? Maybe I have been through many good and bad past-times that sometimes I feel like owning a time machine. So I can travel back to all those moments, where I could only think of being myself, as happy and colorful as a rainbow. One of God's best creation is surely the rainbow, which will paint a smile on my face everytime I witness one after a shower from Mr.Cloud. Hoho. Anyways, back to the topic. Recently, I saw some old photos of mine lying around the house and wondering why is it not in the album. Oh well. The photos were the little and naive me back in England. I was fairer (T_T) and slimmer (T_T) and of course I look like small girl, not a teenager ^^. Those years were the best probably for my entire living life, including 2 years growing up at Indianapolis. For now, I'm eightteen and I think its still early to judge about how my living years has been right? I should look forward to graduating, get a job and career, finding the Perfect One, getting married, build my own Baitul Muslim, watch my kids grow and my husband aging, getting promoted for my job...and the list goes on and on. But then again, we have the power to plan, while the Almighty has the power to decide. Whatever it is, He gives the best among the best, and I should wait, be thankful for what I have now.


If you know me, once a had a memory with me, I surely do treasure those times. Do not worry, for I will never (insyaAllah) forget all those moments we created together. You are now a part of my life. Even if it had left a scar on me, a wound that can never be treated or cleaned, I let go of it and move on. Moving on isnt easy, and people say time heals. So it does really. In the end, I look on the bright side, think of the hikmah behind it. Allah really does know the best after all :)

In conclusion, my life is still a long way to go, a neverending journey. The last stop of the journey would be?

Take a guess :D
(serious and positive ones please)

Song of the day :

Paradise - Coldplay


Now..back to books.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Maal Hijrah 1433


@FarahAs's blogspot

Salam.

New Year, new blessings, new resolutions. But I'll keep it to myself eventually.
One word that suits right now is, BERMUJAHADAH.

I may not look GOOD, act GOOD in anybody's eyes. I have my own weaknesses that still cannot be repaired, I'm weak and sensitive, my Iman goes up and down, I feel guilty easily, I'm easily distorted and the list goes on and on..but 1433 Hijr is a space where I can make amends with myself with all these things. Plus, lets not dwell on the past, because thats the reason why sometimes it's so hard for me to move on.

The chance has already been given. So everyone, lets use it wisely and to the fullest?
Barakallahufikum!


Good news, they're back this weekend. Allah has protected them throughout their pilgrimage period, syukur!